Tag:Jose Canseco
Posted on: May 2, 2008 5:53 pm
Edited on: May 2, 2008 5:58 pm

Blog Cabin: Canseco takes out ad for roommate

In the news...

After a foreclosure, Jose Canseco is walking away from his $2.5 million home in California.

Canseco said that his worth has been overestimated. After taxes, Canseco said, he was “only left with about $17 or $18 million, not even.” The former MVP also said that he’s been taking care of his whole family, and that he’s had a pair of expensive divorces, which have contributed to his financial plight.

Man, I guess those steroid books didn’t do quite as well as we all thought.

Don’t worry, Jose, I’ve already drafted your ad for the newspaper. I can’t say that it’s a ringing endorsement, but if you’re lucky, maybe Mike Tyson or Dennis Rodman will have a spare room available.

ROOMATE NEEDED - Former MLB star wants to move in to Encino area house or apartment. Would host frequent parties. Still somehow capable of pulling very hot women... and then sometimes beating them.

- Have not held steady job since 2001. Alimony payments, legal fees and large family mean flexible rent dates a priority.

- Sordid past and ruining of national pastime make security a must. Home must be discrete, and have good locks and shatter-proof windows.

- Sterile area/roommate with medical experience a plus. Please call if you are able to perform injections, or if you have dermatological experience making you qualified to deal with frequent back-acne outbreaks.

- Please have dimensions of bathroom medicine cabinet handy before calling.

From the Blogosphere...

Milwaukee fan ballinglove1 is questioning the Brewers decision to replace Yovani Gallardo in the rotation. This member thinks that keeping the young pitcher would be the smartest choice, since the pitching staff could struggle greatly if someone went down with an injury.

Yankeechick has some relationship advice for men... or maybe she needs some advice about them, I'm not quite sure which. In any case, maybe this blog will finally unravel the mysteries of gender.

Snowed-in in South Dakota, cheezhead415 wants to know what's going on with Brett Favre. I can't help wondering myself? What's with the awards and video game covers?
Posted on: May 1, 2008 7:09 pm
Edited on: May 1, 2008 7:18 pm

Blog Cabin: Clemens at Neverland with Miley Cyrus

In the news...

OK, so maybe Roger Clemens hasn’t yet been linked to Jacko or Achy Breaky’s daughter, but seriously, who would be surprised at this point.

If the recent reports that Clemens started a romantic relationship with an underage Mindy McReady weren’t enough, more allegations of infidelity are now gaining steam.

Apparently, Clemens may have also had a relationship John Daly’s ex-wife, and was accused of trying to put the moves on the wife of former wrestler Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake. (Looks like the Rocket may have made a pass at Jose Canseco’s wife after all.)

Wow. Can someone tell me how this cluster of freaks doesn’t have a reality show already? I mean, shouldn’t they at least have made an appearance on Springer?

“Can you imagine what would happen if we stuck Roger, Jose, four women, Brian McNamee, a few congressmen and 100 bottles of steroids in one house... and then forced them to stop being polite and start getting real?”

I know what would happen... I would take a bat to my television set.

The biggest problem here is that there is only one person that can stop the circus... Roger Clemens.

Enough already, Roger. This is getting painful to watch, and there’s nothing you can do to save your image. You’ve probably got more skeletons in that closet, too. They will be found, Roger.

All you have to do is stop being stubborn and drop the legal action. You’re a cheating dirt bag... and we all know it. You will never go to the Hall of Fame, and will probably end up coaching a minor league team after your wife leaves you.

Please Rocket, think of my TV, and don’t forget about that guest house you had at the Neverland Ranch.

From the Blogosphere...

OK, so everyone is tired of LeBron's faking and complaining, right? That's what BennySmack02 says, and he has more than enough proof to back it up.

As always, our unofficial, official Marlins blogger, PAOLO, brings us his thoughts on the Florida's most recent action. It you didn't see the game, this member has everything you need... Oh yeah, and don't forget to drop Kevin Gregg from your fantasy team. What a bum.

Are the Yankees in trouble? Can New York fans and ownership deal with a rebuilding phase? These are the questions that mf10018 poses in Fisher's Baseball Blog.

TigerMAN breaks down the MLB Cy Young races after one month of action. So far, this user puts Brandon Webb at the top of the NL, while Cliff Lee sits atop the AL heap.
Posted on: March 25, 2008 5:05 pm
Edited on: March 25, 2008 5:06 pm

College football casts Spaceballs

On the college football board, hetuck1 started a thread to cast the movie Spaceballs using characters from around the game. Here are the probables so far. Who would you add? Who would you change? Click Here for the thread.

Lonestar.......Jim Tressel
Barf.......Charlie Weis
Princess Vespa.......Bonnie Bernstein
Prince Valium.......Jim Tressel
Dark Helmet.......Nick Saban or
Steve Spurrier
The President.......Pete Carroll
Yogurt.......Joe Paterno
Pizza The Hut.......Mark Mangino
Alien monster.......Rich Rodriguez
Bearded lady.......Mike Hart

In the news: A copy of Jose Canseco's upcoming book, Vindicated: Big Names, Big Liars, and The Battle to Save Baseball, was leaked to a freelance writer in Massachusetts. The writer says that, in the book, Canseco talks about introducing A-Rod to a steroid supplier and also accuses A-Rod of pursuing his wife.

Big surprise here. A-Rod is the next home run king, and any mention of him would obviously bring the most attention (and money) to Jose's book. The only problem is that most of Jose's first book seems to be true. So, where do we stand?

Jose obviously doesn't want to "save" baseball. Whether you love or hate A-Rod, he was, up to this point, a clean player. Thus, his career would have, in all likelihood, erased much of the smudge made by the steroid era. Canseco is obviously in it for the cash, but that doesn't make it untrue.

Great job Canseco. Way to insure that the game stays ruined for generations to come. Can't we just make a deal with this guy? He gets an open invitation to all reality TV shows, and in return, he can never talk publicly or write about baseball again. Seems fair to me.

From the blogosphere....

Another Minnesota Wild fan, Robtangle, is talking about his team's "ferris wheel" performance down the stretch. He's justifiably worried that, if this keeps up, the team has little chance of winning a seven-game series, and may not even make the playoffs.

Hunter21 says that this is the year that Kobe finally gets the MVP nod. Hold on a sec. Didn't the Lakers only get good once Pau Gasol got there?

"Why limit the Madness to March?" That's the question Redbird poses as he makes his argument for a playoff system in college football.

Ca_boy69's blog is the place to go for all your Oakland Raiders needs. This member put out two nice blogs today; one with a depth chart and draft needs, and one about Oakland's rumor mill.

Finally, dgmichel shows us unique putter. Calm down, it's not what you think. Although, it does have something to do with wood. I bet I have you a little curious now, huh?
The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views of CBS Sports or CBSSports.com